Tuesday, July 31, 2012


Midsummer - I know the real midsummer was closer to the time Su died but to me this feels like midsummer.   Probably due to the school session timing in childhood!  Here I am, between - Su gone just over a month now. Next month I turn 61. The days pass quietly, hot and long, no longer does it seem that Su is just there, on the sofa, behind me in the hall, or waiting for a bit of that food I'm eating. But the tears still come. And will yet a while no doubt.

Getting maudlin in these years. Or maybe always was so since driving down the road the other day I thought of that song Those Were The Days, released in '68? Even shortly after college I'd hear that and think of days gone by and how true some bits of that song rang for me. Now even more so. The years my kids were small. The years Ray was still alive. The years I had Su... now some days it feels like all is emptiness.

And I know that years from now, I'll still hear that song in my head and the days now, the ones shortly before me, will also be recalled with fondness. So as my birthday is upon me it is time to look forward - to taking action and making sure that twenty years from now my sixties will be a time to remember.